Man promised police officers he would poo in their van – but only managed a wee

A man promised police officers that he would poo in their prisoner transport van after he was arrested, but he only managed to have a wee.

Kevin Wolton, 39, pleaded guilty to criminal damage and using threatening or abusive words or behaviour at Swindon Magistrates’ Court earlier this month (1 February).

Prosecutor Kate Prince said the defendant, of Sheppard Street, Swindon, entered the Cornish Bakehouse in The Parade and asked for free food on 30 December last year.

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When staff refused, he went outside and started begging. Workers asked him to stop asking customers for money outside their store, and he became aggressive.

Wolton re-entered the store and threatened to steal food – shouting and swearing. A young child who witnessed the behaviour was left “clearly upset”.

Police were called to the scene following the morning incident and he was arrested.

During his arrested, he told the officers he would defecate in their police van. Despite his attempts, he only managed to urinate, and a deep clean was required.

The court heard that alcoholic Wolton has a “long list of previous convictions”, including sexual assault, assault and theft going back many years. He was on post-sentence supervision at the time of these offences.

Mark Glendenning, defending, said his client knows the staff in the Cornish Bakehouse and they know his situation, often giving him food they might otherwise throw away at the end of the day.

He said the defendant is generally complying with the requirements of his post-sentence supervision.

At this point, Wolton shouted from the dock: “Excuse me judge, do you mind just sending me back to jail?” Mr Glendenning swiftly asked his client to be quiet.

Magistrates imposed an £80 fine, £30 compensation to Wiltshire Police for deep cleaning the van and a £34 victim surcharge – all to be deduced from his benefits.

“You’ve given me a fine for something I didn’t do, can’t I just do couple of days in jail”, he shouted as he left the dock.

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